Navigating Identity and Belonging During the Chinese New Year Festivities
Chinese New Year (CNY) in Singapore is a time for unity, celebration, and reconnecting with family. However, for many biracial Singaporeans, the holiday can bring about a sense of exclusion, as they often struggle with the feeling of not being “Chinese enough.” The mixed-race experience, especially during such culturally significant moments, can be complex and fraught with identity tensions.
The article dives into the personal stories of individuals who grapple with their ethnic identity during Chinese New Year. For some, like Kelly, who is of Chinese and Thai descent, there’s a strong sense of connection to her Thai heritage, despite outwardly appearing “Chinese passing.” She shares how she faces comments about her mixed background and doesn’t fully resonate with Chinese traditions, such as food preferences. Similarly, Rslyne, who is of Chinese and Sinhalese descent, recounts awkward experiences with relatives who express confusion or surprise at her appearance, often commenting on her beauty or questioning her fluency in Chinese. These instances leave her feeling alienated, despite being fully immersed in Chinese culture.
Sarah, of Chinese and Malay descent, also shares her experience of trying to prove her Chinese identity to new family members, especially when she cannot speak Mandarin fluently. She describes how her skin tone sometimes causes doubt among relatives, yet she continues to navigate these interactions with grace, despite the feeling of needing to justify her place within the Chinese community.
Joshua, who is of Chinese and Indian heritage, talks about feeling disconnected from both cultures, especially during Chinese New Year. His experiences highlight how cultural practices like playing mahjong or singing Chinese karaoke are distant from his personal experience. For him, Chinese New Year feels like “dipping his toes” into Chinese culture without fully engaging, especially as his family’s celebration is mixed with Indian traditions due to his father’s background.
Another biracial individual, whose Chinese relatives live in Italy, admits feeling somewhat envious of those with two Chinese sides during CNY. With no relatives to visit on the second day, she has learned to spend that time with her Italian mother, embracing non-CNY activities like going to the movies. However, she still sees Chinese New Year as a way to stay connected to her roots and carry on traditions into the future, should she marry someone from a similar cultural background.
These stories shed light on the nuanced realities of being biracial in Singapore and navigating the complexities of identity during the Chinese New Year festivities. The experiences of feeling “not Chinese enough” reflect deeper questions of belonging and cultural integration, particularly for those who feel caught between two worlds.
