Navigating the Pressure to Love Your Job and Its Impact on Mental Health
A few years ago, at my grandmother’s wake, I had a sudden realisation about my unhealthy attachment to work. While my family mourned, I was sitting in the back of the funeral hall, responding to emails and ticking off tasks that, in hindsight, weren’t urgent. I wasn’t the only one. My cousins from Singapore had even found power points to set up makeshift workstations. Meanwhile, others, like my cousins from Malaysia, were busy folding joss paper.
That moment struck me—was it really necessary to be working during such a time? My decision to work through the wake wasn’t dictated by my boss; it was a personal choice, likely stemming from a desire not to disrupt my schedule. I realised that my cousins probably felt the same way.
This wasn’t an isolated incident. When I asked a few others about work culture in Singapore, a common theme emerged—work-life balance is virtually non-existent. Bryan Lim, a 33-year-old editor, summed it up well: “There’s still this mindset passed down from older generations that working harder equals success, but we now know that’s not always true.”
While hard work is valued, many of us are far from satisfied with our careers. Millennials and Gen Z, in particular, seem to be the burnout generation, and movements rejecting the conventional work-life structure are gaining traction. People are quitting jobs without any plans for what comes next, simply to find relief.
Even those who stay in their jobs seem disillusioned. How many of us feel excited to go back to work after a holiday?
The problem isn’t solely about us. The way we’ve been taught to perceive work—as a vocation demanding sacrifice with little reward—could be the root cause of our dissatisfaction.
The Myth of Loving Your Job
We’ve all heard the phrase: “Find a job you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life.” It implies that the struggle of work is worth it if you’re passionate. However, this is often far from the reality.
Yan, a 50-year-old quantity surveyor, shares a sentiment many of us can relate to: “I love my job and my colleagues, but the increasing workload is overwhelming. Management doesn’t acknowledge our concerns, treating them as mere complaints.” Over the years, Yan’s responsibilities have grown, yet her pay has remained stagnant. Despite her passion for the role, the job no longer returns the same level of satisfaction.
Similarly, Esme Sedket, a 23-year-old financial advisor, recounts her time in the animation industry where workers were driven by passion but faced exploitation. “Many of my classmates left the industry because the pay was low,” she says, remembering a classmate who earned less than she did when working in F&B.
Even when we love our jobs, emotional investment can backfire when things don’t go as expected. One piece of advice that helped me was from a fellow writer: “Care a little less.”
Finding Fulfillment Outside Work
While work can bring satisfaction, it shouldn’t be the only source of fulfilment. Mohamed Ibrahim Shah, a 25-year-old printer support staff, highlights the importance of balance: “When I’m not working, I volunteer in mental health and read. Work is just a part of who I am.”
For Bryan, his current job in content curation has brought more freedom and better pay. “It’s less about the job, and more about the lifestyle it gives me,” he says.
Isaac Tan, who shifted from a high-stress investigative role to a more relaxed reporting job, finds joy in hobbies like judo and swimming. “My identity used to be tied to my job—now it’s about a broader range of things.”
I too am realising that what I truly love is not my job itself, but the process of writing and connecting with people. I can pursue these passions beyond work.
Rethinking the Value of Work
Work serves many purposes, from earning a living to providing a sense of purpose. However, it’s time to reconsider whether it’s healthy to define our self-worth solely by our jobs.
Amber, a 31-year-old public servant, admits: “If money wasn’t an issue, I wouldn’t work. I live for the weekends.”
Many young Singaporeans are beginning to recognise that they may not achieve the same career success their parents did. For them, happiness comes from exploring different facets of life, not just through work.
Career expert Louis Puah advises separating hobbies from work. “If you’re doing something just for enjoyment, it should be a hobby, not part of your job,” he suggests. “At work, think about who you are serving.”
Even in jobs that seem mundane, like receptionist roles, finding a sense of purpose can make a big difference. Isaac, for example, finds satisfaction in doing his job well, regardless of how dull it might seem.
Dismantling Toxic Work Culture
We need to challenge the narratives that prioritise work over well-being. We’ve been conditioned to hustle relentlessly for success, but it’s not necessary to dedicate our lives to a job that makes us unhappy. You don’t have to love your job to live a fulfilling life.
As Esme contemplates balancing several part-time roles, she embodies the notion that there’s no one-size-fits-all approach to work.
Ultimately, whether working for financial stability like Amber or pursuing passion projects like Ibrahim, the key to happiness is understanding why you work—and being content with your choices.
