Facing loss led one woman to address the “taboo” topic of planning for the future with her mother.
For 40-year-old Seline Cai, the sudden death of her uncle in April 2022 served as a harsh reminder of the importance of legacy planning. His passing left her family struggling to manage his affairs, revealing gaps in his preparations.
Her uncle, who suffered from critical-stage heart disease, passed away suddenly without leaving a will. His estranged relationship with his son meant there was little guidance for his Indonesian wife, who arrived in Singapore two days after his death. Ms. Cai spent seven months helping her aunt handle his estate, which included a Housing Board flat and CPF savings.
The challenges she faced inspired her to have a difficult but necessary conversation with her 74-year-old mother later that year. Broaching the “taboo” topic, Ms. Cai emphasized the importance of having both a will and a Lasting Power of Attorney (LPA).
An LPA allows an individual to appoint someone they trust to make decisions on their behalf should they lose the ability to do so. By referencing her uncle’s lack of planning, Ms. Cai made the need for these documents relatable and urgent to her mother, who eventually agreed to create an LPA, naming her children as donees.
Ms. Cai also simplified the process for her mother by drafting the LPA using an online form and assisting her during an event where the document could be certified. She engaged a lawyer to finalize her mother’s will soon after. These efforts not only reduced confusion but also eased her mother’s burden.
Beyond the LPA and will, Ms. Cai is helping her mother consider an Advance Care Plan (ACP), which outlines healthcare preferences. While the process is ongoing, Ms. Cai ensures her mother feels supported and unpressured, recognizing the emotional weight of such decisions.
For Ms. Cai, these steps are not just about preparedness but also about lessening the burden on loved ones when the unexpected happens. Her advice to others is clear: starting the conversation early and choosing the right moment can make a significant difference in encouraging family members to act.
